Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Have I ever worn a Yellow Chaddi ??

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B

A dude asked me today if I had ever worn a yellow chaddi..

An evil smile played wickedly on his face, one of his eyebrows touching the sky.

Well..I'm usually quite open on any topic under the sun..and moon at nights..
And jus' cuz' people know about this fact - anybody with a twisted mind in my office thinks he can come up n' ask any damn thing he can think of, might have thought of last night or has ever wondered who the perfect bakra cud be to ask it to.

And more often than not..invariably..
(CUT. FRAME 2..SCENE 5, ROLLING..CAMERA..ACTION !)

Urs truly....enters the picture.

(Background music anyone??)

My job makes me a perfect stupidomando candidate for an experiment on such topics in my office. (Shhhhhh keeping mum on what I do yet. Just trust me on that.)

Well so...here I was..looking at this nutcase lookin' back at me with a cracked smirk askin' this goddammitnonsensenobusinessofhis question with the expectation that I'd topple over...think for a few minutes and then give him the title of the most intelligent man on earth for askin' such a question...and maybe a chance for him to die laughing.

Nothing like that happened. Not even remotely close. But yea, I had to give an answer. Prestige ka sawaal, u c? Not to mention an excited audience that had been attracted (maybe setup) and were on my face wondering wot my answer to that would be.

The new gossip was about to have it's birth right in front of everyone. And I was gonna be it's FATHER. NOOOoooooo...I wasn't gonna get screwed.
(I've decided not to marry until someone gets me pregnant first...uh..wotevah*)

Had I ever worn a yellow chaddi ?? Hmm..now..well, yea..I had. One of my chaddis did have that color with that all too famous leopard skin design on it. I remember wearing it way long back...back in the 19th century maybe...long long back.

Fortunately for me, although he was rubbing his hands in anticipation of an expected answer, he had made an error in his question.

He wanted to have his fun on my expense in context to the Ram sena thing that happened last week in Bangalore, with all those pink chaddis sent to them n' all..but in his hurry he had forgotten to add to his question if I had ever worn a LADIES yellow chaddi. THAT is wot he REALLY wanted to ask.

AH HAH..A minute of careful concentrated diagnosis of the dumb question had yielded results. I had seen the loop hole..the flaw..the break through..and undoubtedly I had to get my finger in it...through it. I think did.

I grabbed the chance, pulled my chin up, my chest out, so my embarrassment doesn't show and said out loud.."Yea U ass*ole I HAVE worn a yellow chaddi. No bias against color u c. And jus so u know..I happened to like it..cuz it was a MALE chaddi. Grow up dude or do u still go to ur mama for milk ??"

And while I high fived the other few guys who acted the audience part of going in a frenzy of cheer and whistle..to the 'T', I knew I had scored a hit.

It was Check Mate.

I saw the poor dude's face changing into varied emotions all in a flash and then transfixing finally on that of revenge. The 'damnnit rabbit, next time...next time..jus' u waittt...' look.

Office is fun..so is being popular !!
wink :->

16 Spoke their mind: yep, makes a difference !!

10V said...

wow...I love ur ability to make even the most common situation into a hilarious blog...

Keep up the good work...

Tanu Anand said...

hhahahaa! i could just about imagine standing as part of the audience, watching you do all that u mentioned here! i must say i love the ability you have to 'narrate'! very impressive and the yellow chaddis...dudeeee! hahaaha! was that guy a crack or wat? ;)

Scarlet said...

I love the way you handled that. You are a comical genius...bold, too!!

I would love to work in your office! ;)

Anand said...

Tanu, If u were one of the audience..I'd have Hi fived u too.
Nah, the guy is arright. Fun to be around with actually. We r pals..now that he's revealed he had once worn violet ones too.
Lol.

Anand said...

Scarlet..u r too generous with ur compliments. I feel.. well...blushed out..to be honest.
N' nahh U dont wanna work where I work..we r bullies of the first degree. U wont survive.
unless ofcourse...I offer u some..well..umm.. "protection".
wink wink..
Thanx somuch for ur comments.
Love,
Anand. :-)

Tanu Anand said...

VIOLET!!!! thats even more outrageous than yellow! lol.. please ensure that the 'revealing' stops now! and what is tis company with such interesting people? :)

Anand said...

Haha..Yea it has stopped..temporarily. Can't peak into the future though.
:-)

Self- Proclaimed Shoe Addict said...

ok i just read this post. frankly yellow aint one of my fav colours. actually depends wht shade of yellow is it?

but yeah i hate to admite it u R intelligent! dammit!

Anand said...

Self Proclaimed......Me intelligent ??? Surely U jest.

Really?? U think so?? ANYONE LISTENING TO THISSSS ??????????
ANYONEE ????? Lol.

Thanx a ton my dear but think THAT needs a review..

Sakshi said...

Am gonna come back and settle down in Mumbai and hope ur office cafeteria is open to outsiders?? Such a place with nut cases is what I call heaven..(na don't want to work there, am such a lazy person only skill available is yapping)

Duhh yellow chaddi, pink chaddi.....bhat the hell is happening to this world?? Violet sounds interesting though...I mean the color not the chaddi

Anand said...

Sakshi...............It's not as gud as I make it out to be. Maybe I paint too pretty a picture of it. Lol.

Hey..Yappin ain't bad. I like yappers. No Probs.

Yea..Yellow..Violet...how does it matter? I hv no bias against colors, u c? Heee

ankita mehta said...

On second thoughts you could have added some more mirchi to your Smart answer-Yea U ass*ole I HAVE worn a yellow chaddi. No bias against color u c. And jus so u know..I happened to like it..cuz it was a MALE chaddi. Grow up dude or do u still go to ur mama for milk ??" Infact, I have not worn a CHADDI today!! now what difference has it made to the world??? You check your chaddi colour and get back to work"

hehehehe!"wink...............y!

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